I want to kill myself: A thought which has crossed all of our minds

        Irrespective of the age today’s day the biggest defence mechanism. “I will do away with my life; I will be done with all these worries, pain and problems”. Now the question is “whether is it normal to think so? Are we abnormal??”

But then what we fail to realise that actually when that thought comes and we give in for some time and then we are living the next day. Sublimely we have ignored that the effort we take to live that next moment has actually killed that negative in you and you have lived through. “U, won the battle”.

This though doesn’t come coz we are weak, it comes when u think Ur weak. A thought makes u weak, so feel good; this is the difference we need to find out between our feelings and thinking.

Our thoughts and feelings when they are not in congruence we feel sad. We all how much ever we may deny we have two voice within us. They are at war with each other, and its our responsibility to strike a balance and homogeneity.

Now how do we know, what we are feeling and thinking? There is a line which i hug close to my heart “emotions – YES; emotional drama – NO”. I shall say u a small anecdote;  Janaki a friend of mine, once i was at her place to bond over a cup of coffee. She was placed the vessel with milk on the stove and we were lost in our conversation. After few in we heard a loud cry from the kitchen, it was her husband “Janu the milk has over flown.... Why are u so careless?” janaki rushed to the kitchen i followed. Janaki’s response shook for i was sure the way her husband yelled at her, knowing her i felt she would yell back. But she just looked at him and said “I am also seeing that the milk has over flown, and then will ur yelling at me fill the vessel with milk? No right!!! Then why blow ur lungs out at me?” her husband looked at her and just left in silence.

Now we are also overcome with emotions and give into them that is why our rationality is overcome by emotions. Janu was very careful after that episode she learnt something, not only learning she has remembered her learning and applied it. Thus due to stressful situations or lack of resources narrowing down we think of giving up and come to a non functional stage. When hopeless feeling, and helpless thinking combine they give way to the unforgivable sin. We are all beautiful creatures, a one time chance to live it up... as i always say.. life is too short for anything to remain constantly in life... “CHANGE IS THE VERY ESSENCE OF LIFE” embrace it..           -maya